It’s not easy being me (@ 63)

You have to picture this… I find that when I put my hat on nowadays it’s always cocked sideways. I don’t do this on purpose. I think it’s just the way I see things anymore. I also have lost about 10 lbs (On purpose) to improve my running and health, but it’s left me with a pants problem…When I wear my favorite shorts and I have my wallet and cell phone in my pockets, it’s a struggle to keep them from falling around my knees. I also wear a right calf sleeve to compress my calf a promote healing an injury I had a couple of weeks ago. My only pair of prescription sunglasses are now held together by a safety pin. (Sue says it’s my “grunge” look). She also told me today that I need to shave my ears…

So off doing some errands today, last stop Pathmark for Hamburger meat and a few other things. Sue and I decide to try the self check out. Again, you have to picture me with my hat on crooked, pants fallin down, black sleeve on one leg, “grunge” glasses and in need of an ear shave… (if anyone looked closely, they’d also discover that I cut my own hair – what’s left of it). So, checkin out – We started out ok until we came to the bananas. They didn’t have a barcode so the machine showed us pictures of fruits and vegetables – we found a picture of the bananas, but the machine yelled at us because we were holding the bananas in our hand. We realized you’re supposed to keep them on the scale so the machine can calc weight and price them properly. We learned. Next came the zucchini. We couldn’t find a picture that looked like a zucchini, so I pressed the cucumber picture. It wouldn’t accept it – no matter how hard or how many times I pushed that ^&*&^ button. (I just could not believe this thing can tell the difference between Cucumbers and zucchini) Finally the Pathmark lady yelled over “Use your finger nails” – Ok but by this time Sue was doubled over and threating to wet herself. Finally we get to the point where we pay via credit card the machine says to report to the main cashier. Felt like “ Patrick Stewart, please report to the principal’s office” . Upon arrival, we informed the lady that the machine told us to see you… She shrugged and “no worries.. goodbye….”

About Patrick

Old enough to know better
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